Are You Kidding Me?!

Tuesday was one of those days where I didn't get enough sleep or enough coffee to be a happy mom.  Kids naps didn't line up, so mommy didn't get a nap either.  Then David called to say he had a late appointment and wouldn't be home until 7:30 or so.  Well, I hung up from him and immediately called my parents - "Can we please come over before I go crazy?"  Sigh of relief.  We went to Mimi & Papa's house.  My dad ordered Olive Garden for dinner and bought Bolt for the boys to watch!  Hooray!  No left over roast.  I can make it until bedtime!  

Mom's phone rang and it was for me.  "Hello, this is Carol from South Crest Hospital.  We have your husband.  He's in stable condition.  Do you think you'll be able to come down here?"  WHAT???!!!

David had over-medicated his six-week-long sinus infection.  One way or another his inner-ear was affected.  Acute onset Vertigo hit him while he was driving down Hwy 169 during 5:30 traffic.  He said he had no sensation of the gas or break.  He made the decision to head to the easiest emergency room to navigate to, drove 80 down the highway crying out to God for his life (he had no idea what was going on with his body).  He pulled his car up to the emergency room doors and FELL OUT!  He had no balance at all.  Someone helped him into the hospital, they put him on a gurney and hauled him off.  After evaluation they gave him a steroid shot through his IV that sent painful tingles all over his body.  He told the nurse what he was feeling and she said, "Oh, it's probably your imagination" !!!  (South Crest is not on my good hospital list anymore!)

He was released around 10:30 with prescriptions in hand but without any good directions at all - like DON'T DRIVE YOURSELF HOME!!!  My parents cam to the rescue again and went to pick David up where he had pulled off the highway. Seriously!

All this time I've been communicating with David or a nurse from home - kids asleep, praying and crying and not really knowing what's going on and feeling so helpless to do anything.  I picked up my Jesus Calling book and read the daily reading:

"This is a time in your life when you must learn to let go: of loved ones, of possessions, of control."  Are you kidding me?  The rest of it was encouraging and all that, but that first line threw me!  All I could think about were the what-ifs in my situation.  My husbands life and the huge hospital bill, just to name a couple.  I hate to admit this, but the whiner I am, I immediately went into the "why me" prayer.  All I want is for everyone to be well and to be able to pay the bill.  Seriously, is that so much to ask?  I don't want to be rich and famous.  I don't even care if I'm ever skinny again (cause that's such a big deal, right?!)  This is the most awful day!  What is going on?

It has taken me a few days to settle down and look back on the situation to get a handle on my Israelite ways.  The next day I read Jesus Calling again, "Let thankfulness temper all your thoughts.  A thankful mind-set keeps you in touch with Me.  I hate it when My children grumble, casually despising My sovereignty.  Thankfulness is a safeguard against this deadly sin.  Furthermore, a grateful attitude becomes a grid through which you perceive life.  Gratitude enables you to see the Light of My Presence shining on all your circumstances.  Cultivate a thankful heart, for this glorifies Me and fills you with joy."  1 Cor 10:10; Heb 12:28-29

Don't make another pot of coffee, don't grab your comfort food or go shopping or clean house to make yourself feel better.  Sit down and count your blessings.  Be thankful right now for where you are and what the Lord has put on your plate.  Don't let yourself fall into that deadly sin of casually despising God's sovereignty in your life.  And please don't make me learn this lesson again!

PS - David is doing much better :)